Michael Musto, the popular columnist for the Village Voice and a mouthy groundbreaker releases a new book, Fork on the Left, Knife in the Back. This book is a collection of columns and essays and zooms in on Musto's favorite celebs to punk (Sean Combs, Paris Hilton); New York's most debauched and amusing nightlife experiences; and Musto's own odysseys, as he talks about the art of TV whoring and the allure of kinky sex, pausing to don drag to imagine what it must be like to be him as Lindsay Lohan as Marilyn Monroe. Stopping for some actual appreciation, the section called "Weirdo’s Are My Heroes" celebrates the oddballs and entertainers who’ve elevated the culture, shockingly including Jerry Springer and Sarah Silverman. The book also features an introduction written by Musto, as well as new pieces on universal fame in the new-media age, the state of the celebrity closet, and the appeal of blind gossip items.
1. How/ when did you decide to make a career in writing? As a pre-adolescent, I would see movies at the neighborhood theater and then come home and write reviews for myself on little index cards. I never imagined I could turn that into a career! But at Columbia, I wrote for the school paper and also freelanced on the side, so I got a taste for the sheer fun of being a print commentator. I decided to go for it when I graduated, and though I always secretly longed to be a performer too, I get my stage yayas out by being on TV a lot. So let me pat myself on the humpback--I made the right choice.
2. What makes Fork on the Left, Knife in the Back different from your other books? It's a collection like my last one, "La Dolce Musto: Writings By The World's Most Outrageous Columnist," but this one also has some original essays in it--about the fine art of blogging, the nuisance called social networking, the allure of blind items, and the closeting by the media of certain stars they decide are off limits. This is book is SO me. It's like a print version of Musto the man--as well as a sort of literary gold watch, since it commemorates my 25th year at the Village Voice! Read it and enter my twisted yet fertile mind.
3. What is the best thing about being a critic? First of all, I basically get paid to go to parties, premieres, Broadway shows, and nightclubs. The events I get to witness and people I get to talk to are astounding. And then at the end of the week, I get to sit down and write whatever the hell I want about it all! It's cathartic and exciting and as a result of letting out my opinions and observations, I don't need therapy! Plus the column has become a home base whereby on the side I get to also do a blog, write books like this, and make public appearances. It's the best! I recommend it for everyone.
4. Who is your favorite critic/ gossip columnist (other than yourself)? Why? I have to love Perez Hilton--and he gave me the blurb, "Michael Musto is God!" And naturally I love Keith Olbermann, whose show I'm on, and Rachel Maddow, who comes on after him. They put a sparkplug up Republicans' butts and their fiery comments really make a difference. I also admire theater critics (like the New York Times') for their dedication to seeing all kinds of shows and dissecting them with a fine scalpel. But my favorite critic is "Anonymous"--the person who sits back and posts outrageous comments on blogs (like mine), often making them extremely funny and readable. But sometimes he/she can be really mean!
5. You coined the word 'celebutard.' What does it mean? Who is the ultimate 'celebutard'? Why? I didn't know I coined that until I read it on Wikipedia! The things you learn! But I guess it's a semi affectionate (but dismissive) term for those who crave the spotlight and get it but sometimes don't know what to do with it. It's for the people who have it all--except a clue as to how to proceed with it! A couple of years ago, this referred to Lindsay, Britney, and Paris, but I honestly think two of those three have regrouped and done just fine. And I'm rooting for the third! Nowadays celebutard could refer to anyone from Octomom to Tiger Woods' many girlfriends. These people seem clueless at times but they're great copy. The ultimate celebutard? My cousin the Elvis impersonator.
6. I had no idea that you were (sort of) involved in the whole Party Monster shebang! If you had not written in your columns about the murder of Angel, most people say that Michael Alig and Robert "Freez" Riggs might have never been caught. What are your thoughts on that whole situation? Will you be afraid when/if Michael Alig is released? I am double bolting my door right now just in case Alig gets out. Kidding! He'll probably want to throw a party for me. After all, he seemed to want to get caught. After the hideous killing, I ran a big blind item called "Night Clubbing," spilling the alleged details of what happened, including the hammer, the Drano, the box in the river, everything. Everyone knew who I meant, including Page Six, which picked up on it and it then became a really big story. And of course I kept writing up the whole saga, full of mixed feelings for Alig, who I knew was a party throwing genius while also being a bratty type who, without boundaries, spiraled into a moral abyss. New York now is so sanitized and safe compared to back then--and I don't always say "Thank God" about that. We need some edge. But no murders.
7. Any advice for aspiring writers? Read the writers you admire and learn from them, but don't copy. Keep at it and you'll find your own voice. It might not happen right away--it didn't for me--but in time you'll come upon your sense of style and ethics and you'll know how far to go to make your points. Also, be aggressive. Especially in this landscape, it's not easy to become a professional writer, so really go after it--but not so much that editors take out restraining orders.
8. Any other passions? If you were not a writer what do you think you would be doing? I get to do everything I want! I've written a novel, done music videos, appeared on game shows. People say 'You should take a vacation and go see movies.' But I see movies every night! And I've even traveled around the world! I even occasionally have time to read books on the rare moments when I'm on the subway. I guess I could go bowling more, but hey, I'll live if I don't!
9. When you appeared in the Cyndi Lauper Music Video for "Hey Now (Girls Just Want to Have Fun) you were in Drag. Was it your first time? What was the best part? It wasn't my first time--I have a past--but it was interesting to be with so many great drag queens and to be directed by Cyndi herself! And the choreographer was future Tony winner Jerry Mitchell. He didn't care for my ratty outfit (he was right), so they switched me into something jazzier. He also didn't care for my dancing. But I never said I was a dancer! I hardly even said I was a writer! Still, it was a really special experience and we got to perform the song live at Yankee Stadium for the Gay Games!!!
10. Speaking of Queens, if you had to pick one, who is your favorite Drag Queen? I love them all because they have the balls, as it were, to dig into their inner fabulous woman and bring her out for the world to see. My favorite is Peppermint for being such a great all-around entertainer, but I also give props to Bunny, Epiphany, Sherry Vine, Shequida, and so on and so on.
Visit Michael Musto daily on his blog: http://blogs.villagevoice.com/dailymusto/
And be sure to pick up Fork on the Left, Knife in the Back in stores everywhere or Amazon.com
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